Where Has the Time Gone?

Ok, so I've had the busiest week EVER it feels like. School is coming to a close for the summer, I had cupcake orders (Woohoo!). Stayed with Whitley one night and kept Dalton one afternoon. Baby shower on Saturday. Went to church today and met my favorite twin boys for the first time. Whew. I'm tired just writing about it all!

As you can see from the photos, Dalton REALLY enjoyed helping aunt Kayla clean the batter off the spatula. He was a little leery at first, but got the hang out it real quick!

Luckily, after this week I'll have a little (very little) time off of school to relax and chill out. Friday I leave to meet the fam in Tybee Island, Georgia for a mini vacay. I'm excited to be on the beach for a hot second and to get the heck out of Robertson County for a few nights.


Among my busy week, I made time to invite myself to dinner at my grandparent's house several times, and when I say several, I mean three. That's right. I invited myself to eat, spur of the moment, THREE times this week. Are they not the best? Really and truly, I have what is quite possibly the best grandparents and in turn family on the face of the earth.
Not every granddaughter gets to grow up staying at her grandparents house. Myself, my sister and some of my cousins were lucky enough to never have to go to day care. Instead we got to hang out with each other and spend time with my grandma all day long. Both my grandparents are relatively young, especially to have several grown grandchildren. So not only did I get to spend time with them as a child, but I can now enjoy them as an adult. They come to parties and dress up. They host a huge Fourth of July extravaganza for our family every year. They even came with us for my 21st birthday weekend in Metropolis.



Most importantly, my grandparents have given me and my cousins a great example of love to live up to. They have been married for 47 years. They've been through hard times, good times, sad times, pretty much anything you can imagine, they've done it. For Christmas this year, the Cousin Club found a wall hanging that pretty much summed up what Maw and Papaw have done for us. It said "All Because Two People Fell In Love" and each of the seven of us signed the back with a little message about how much they mean to us. And really, the words couldn't have been any more true. Without them, our family would be nothing. They were the beginning of it and continue to be the backbone, pulling us together for the good and the bad. Hopefully, I will be getting married on their 50 wedding anniversary in 2013 as a tribute to the example they've been for me. I'm so thankful to have them now and forever!

P.S. I would like to add that Papaw is NOT a cross-dresser, well, usually he isn't. That's the only good picture I have of him and it's from a Halloween Party.

Shameless Plug...

So here I am shamelessly plugging my NEW website and business, Sweetness Cupcakes! I'd love to be a part of your special day!!!

Kids. Kids! Kids?

So I'm not really sure why, but I've been thinking about my possibility as a parent lately. I guess I'm getting to an acceptable age to be a parent these days. Most people that are my age are already parents or gonna be parents very soon. Or at least it seems like it to me. I've never been 100% sure that I ever want to be a parent though. I know each and every one of you just gasped in horror. I'm from the south, I'm young and able, and I MIGHT NOT WANT KIDS?!? Awful, I know.

I used to think that I didn't like kids. They made me real nervous to be around. And the fact that I might have to sacrifice MYSELF for another human? HA yeah I didn't think so. But now that I'm an older sister and aunt and way fun older cousin, I see that I am maybe a little more nurturing and maternal that I had given myself credit for. I love spending time with Dalton, and I think he likes me. And hearing Gage tell me he misses me and loves his Kayla just melts my heart. I like being able to share the wonder that is Baskin Robbins with Hunter and to take Abby and Belle to see a movie and have Giggle-Fest 2010 in the back of my car. I like those things. But is that really mom-material?

I don't really know why I have become consumed by this thought. I have no boyfriend, so I'm certainly not getting married anytime soon. I know I know, you don't have to be married to have a baby, but I hope to be. And maybe someday I'll meet some wonderful man that makes me want to immediately procreate. Who knows! I just am not sure that I'll be a great mom. I think some people were born to be mothers. My sister is definitely one of those people. She always tried to take care of me (Read: Boss me, haha) and when she started trying to have a baby, I knew that once she did, she would take the mom cake, so to speak. And indeed, I was right. She is so patient with Dalton. She knows just what to do when something is wrong, or when he needs something, anytime! I just don't know that I will EVER be like that. People always tell me when it's your own kid its different. And even with Dalton, as I've said before, I've done things I never DREAMED I would do just instinctively. It still just freaks me out to know that I would be solely responsible for another being.

I guess for now I really don't have to know. As I said, I have no boyfriend or intention to marry anytime soon, so I have a little time to work things out. I'll just stick to being an awesome aunt, sister and cousin, which I have on lock if I do say so myself.

Thanks for reading. :)

The Trip From HELL!

So this weekend, I took seven 17 and 18 year olds to Six Flags Over Georgia to celebrate Allison's 18th birthday. Any of you that know me, know that my cousin Treavor, Allison's boyfriend, are unusually close. So for me to spend a weekend with he and his friends is really not out of the ordinary. Bright and early Saturday morning, we loaded up and headed south. There were many, many bad times (hence the title) that I won't elaborate into. What I will tell you about is Treav, Allie, and my boo Ross.

As I said, Treavor and I have always been unusually close. I say unusually because really, how many boy and girl cousins that are six years apart in age hang out on a regular basis? It's bizarre, I know, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. You can look through old pictures from when we were kids, and there is a ridiculous amount of pictures of Treavor and I! I joke to Aunt Deana that I'm gonna but my own baby ad in his senior yearbook to fit them all in. I think he and I are a lot alike, which makes it easier for us to relate. We like to go to games, and swim, and just be goofy pretty much all the time. My favorite tradition that Treavor and I have is the UT/Bama game in October. This will be the third year we've gone together (and hopefully third victory for Bama...ROLL TIDE!) and I'm really, really looking forward to it. Something I'm not looking forward to however, is next fall when he goes to college. Don't get me wrong, I'm excited for him and I will do anything possible to help him attain his dream of attending UT. With that said, I am gonna be a mess when he leaves. And that bothers me more and more everyday.

Ok, so there is a point to this gushing about my love for my cousin, I promise. Along the way of Treav's life, I've met and made friends with so many great kids that are his friends. Two years ago, when my uncle died, I saw more friends reach out to him to support him and care for him than I could ever share with you. There have been a few, though, that have really made an impression on me, and Ross is for sure one of them.

The story about Ross is a funny one. Ross's mom, Bethany (what's up shout out!), and Treavor's mom, Aunt Deana, were BFF in high school. Though Treav and Ross were close to each other in age, they really weren't raised and destined to be BFF like their moms. That's where fate stepped in and brought the two together a couple years ago. Since then (but really forever), Ross and his parents have become like family to Treav, me and our whole family.

Ross is one of those kids that you just want to hug. He is one of my favorites ever and I'm really glad to have gotten connected with him through Treavor. This weekend was the second of many trips to come that Ross has come on with me. He's moving off to Knoxville in like 20 days or something and I'm just about as sad with him leaving as I will be when Treavor does. I'm excited for him and this new part of his life, but sad sad sad to see him go. At least I have his wonderful mom and dad still here in GB to hang out with and many trips to look forward to!

Allison, aka Allie, AllieCat, AllieGator, or Gator, is by far the best addition to the Cousin Club in many, many moons. She and Treav have been seeing each other for almost two years, and in those two years, she has become a wonderful addition to our family.

She is one of the most caring and sweet girls I've ever met and I'm so happy to have gotten to know her and be a part of her life. She comes from a great family, who have welcomed all of us with open arms, which if you know many of us, is not an easy task! I'm looking forward to working with Allison through her college journey to become a teacher like me!

With the help of these three, I made it through an otherwise undesirable weekend. Luckily, I learned that next time, it will just be the four of us! I'm thankful for great family and great friends.

Wait? Loss!

Ahh but a few months ago, I had a goal for my weight loss. I went on spring break with two crazy fun girls and I was bound and determined to look skinny, fresh and fly for it. I worked out every single day, sometimes even twice a day and got to probably my smallest size in my adult life. And IT FELT GOOD!!! I loved how I felt confident in my clothes and with myself prancing around all the other (read: younger, skinnier, hotter) college co-eds on the boat like I belonged. Ahh, the memories.

Meanwhile, back in reality, several months and one or ten too many meals later, I'm back to bigger than when I began my mission for skinny in February. Here's where the problem begins. I've never had much trouble with self-confidence. And I know that sounds beyond douche-y to say, but I just haven't. Do I like everything about my appearance? Heck No. But I rarely look in the mirror and not think, "Dang girl, you look GOOOOD!" That? Right there? Not always the case. It's not that I think I look bad-ha yeah right!- but I know I can be better, be healthier, and be skinnier cause I've been those things before.

Cute Dress Huh? Totally Don't Fit in It Anymore!!

That brings us to today, when I had my come to Jesus chat with myself. Why not now? So I don't have a cruise to be skinny for. So what? I have a LIFE to be skinny for! And more than being skinny, I want to be healthy. I want to not feel winded when I'm playing with Dalton. I want to be able to finish a whole Zumba class without thoughts of death! I want to be around for much longer than these 23 years of mine, so its time to do something about it!

Today, I started counting points with Weight Watchers. I'm not really in to the whole meeting thing, so I'm doing mine online. Lots of my family has had success with the points system, so I hope I can too! In addition to eating better, I hope to exercise more. Tonight, my sister and Allison (formerly known as Allie, Allie Gator, Gator, etc.) went to a Zumba/PiYo class in Greenbrier. I think we are gonna make it a regular thing cause it was super fun! Hopefully, with support from my family and friends, this whole healthy living weight loss business is gonna go pretty smoothly. I'll keep you guys updated!

On a side note, Happy Birthday to two of my favs, Allison (formerly known as Allie) and Charlie!! Love you both!

High/Low

HIGH

This Friday, Nicole and I went to have dinner and catch up with some old friends from college round one, Jenna and Amy. I think that they are pretty much the equivalent of Nicole and I as far as their friendship goes, and I just love them both to death. These two girls welcomed us to Austin Peay and into our sorority more than any others did. They took us in, gave us an excellent example of how to act and who to be around, and became great friends! I don't see them very often since I left school, but when I do, its always a good time and seems like no time has passed since our last hang out. Both Jenna and Amy are in Nicole's wedding and I'm really looking forward to spending more time with them! Love you girls!

LOW

Anyone that knows me, knows I have a love affair with sleep. I love to sleep and can do so at pretty much anytime. This love though, gets in the way of life a lot. Like Friday when I slept through two classes or yesterday when I slept from 9 am until 4 pm. Bum much? I really gotta get control of this, cause seriously? it's not a good habit.

Not a lot happened this week, so I don't have anything to report on. Maybe next week?!

New Plan? No Plan!!

I am a self-realized crazy planner. I love having a plan. I love making a plan happen. I love the stability involved with a plan. I LOVE TO PLAN! When it comes to short term, unimportant plans, I'm really good at making them happen. Sometimes, (read most times) I'm a down to the minute kinda girl. What can I say...I love the pressure. But I always manage to pull it off. Long term plans...well...just keep reading.

When I was in high school, I had a master plan for my life. And against my better judgment and at risk of humiliation, I'm gonna share it with you. I was gonna:

go to college

pledge the perfect sorority

live the great life on campus and be wildly popular and well loved

meet a wonderful man my sophomore year

date said man until the middle of my senior year, then become engaged

marry said man soon after graduation

get the job of my dreams as a Spanish teacher

have one child, a boy

live happily ever after- the end.

This list is completely embarrassing, but really and truly what I thought/wanted to happen. In reality, I accomplished only two of these things that were SO important to me. Life happened, things changed, and my life went down a completely different road.

Meanwhile, a year into college, I hated every minute. I was burnt out and done with classes. So I made the hardest decision of my life and did not return to school. Around this same time, my best guy friend and I decided (two weeks before he moved three hours away) that we were meant for each other. Again, I went into planning mode. We talked about our life together, our plan for making it work when things were tough, our wedding, our kids, everything. I was pleased to have something to look forward to again since my school life had gone to shambles. And guess what? Those things never happened either. He and I are meant to have a life together, just not in a romantic manner. So back to the drawing board again...

Around this same time, I got a new job since school was no longer in the picture. I worked at the bank for a couple months when I was moved to a different location and fell in love. I absolutely loved my job, my coworkers, and my boss. I thought I had found my calling in life-to work in customer service in the banking industry. I stayed in my position as a teller for about two years when I decided I was ready to move up in the bank food chain. I applied and interviewed for several positions to no avail. I was crushed. Yet again, my plans seemed to not be coming together like I wanted.

In October 2009, I started having a quarter life crisis as I like to call it. I was unhappy in my position at work, but couldn't seem to find another one. I wasn't sure anymore that banking was what I wanted to do anyway. I wanted something more flexible and more creative. I knew that going back to my original dream of being an educator and back to school full time was the best way to make this happen. I was terrified though after working full time for three years about going back to the college lifestyle and mostly, not having any money, insurance, friends, etc.

I mulled this over for about five days when we were told to stay after work for an important meeting. In this meeting, I found out that my branch was closing and that I could potentially not have a job. Now, most NORMAL people would have been horrified. I, however, was relieved. This was the sign I needed to let me know school was the right thing. I still didn't know how I would make it happen, I didn't know what I would do, but I knew it was what I had to do. So for the first time ever, I went after something I wanted not knowing what the heck was gonna happen.

I guess I've just been conditioned to think that I have to know exactly what's gonna happen in my life. I'm not really sure how or why I think this way, but I certainly do it. After thinking back to these particular events, I've come to the realization that plans turn south more often than not for me. I set my expectations high and then am let down. I worry so much about long term, that I'm missing out on fun and happiness in the here and now. So, the plan now is to have no plan. To live everyday thinking about that day. I don't know what's gonna happen in my life. I don't know where I'm gonna be in a year, a month, anything. But THAT'S OK!!

Its a journey that I am scared about. But one that I think is gonna be beneficial in the long run. So wish me luck!!

Long Lost Blogger...

Ok, so I know I've been MIA for well over a week now. And I know you faithful readers have been wracking your brains wondering what you must have done to make me leave this wonderful world of online writing so quickly. But never fear gentle readers, I'm back!!

For the past two weeks, I haven't really taken a breath. My family does a huge fourth of July celebration where everyone gets together. We eat a lot, we drink a lot, and we have a LOT of fun. Unlike most families fourth plans, ours last for like a week. So starting Wednesday the 30th of June, the Brown invasion descended upon Robertson County. We had a great turn out this year. Lots of little kiddies running around, enjoying the company of the other cousins their ages. The adults, which hello-how exciting is it that I'm an adult!, played cards, sat at Aunt Geneva's bar, and also enjoyed the company of many aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends. Saturday the 3rd was our big day. We had the usual barbecue meal, fireworks, all that. It was way fun to be with my family, have friends come, and relax on the eve of the special day.

After all that settled down, I spent another fun filled week with my BFF Jason. He came in town for the holiday, so he came to my family stuff and I went to his. The highlight of the week for sure was our visit to Nashville Shores with his mom and brother. I haven't been there in many many years, and it was really a great day. I didn't even get too sunburnt!! After our week here, we both ventured back east to Knoxville for an engagement party Friday and birthday party Saturday. We had a really good time at both and just enjoyed getting to see each other, which rarely happens since he lives so far away. I know a lot of people don't understand Jason and my friendship, and let's be honest, its very unusual. But I'm very thankful to have him as a friend.

I'm sure there are tons of other happenings between my last post and now that I'm forgetting to add, but such is life. I hope to not leave so much time between posts anymore! Thanks for stopping by!

My Stay-Cation

So everyone I know is on vacation this week. Some are in Florida, some in Tybee Island. And can ya guess where I am?? That's right a combination stay-cation between the poor house and summer class. Not really. While my good friends, The Ballard's, are vacationing elsewhere, I'm staying at their beautiful home hanging with their precious dog, Charlie. Me and Chuck (as he goes by on the weekends) are BFFs. We like to lounge together by the pool. Maybe catch some TV in the sun room. Pretty much just chilling, you know, like a villain!

Tonight at the Ballard Plantation, as Treavor and his friends call it, I had my mom, step-dad and sister's family over for some grilling and pool time. The Ballard's pool is to die for. As you can see in the picture with my bro-in-law, they have a lovely waterfall that really adds to the ambiance of the pool setting. Yes, I just said ambiance. Dalton, as well as his daddy, was thoroughly impressed with said waterfall as well as the diving board. Sister, J-Rod, and I had a jumping contest (reigning form champion! woo!) that Mom and Dalton judged. Mom aka Grammy showed off her mean back dive skills much to Sister's and my dismay (We've already been in the ER once this week, let's not push our luck).

I'm really enjoying having the house to myself. Kinda let's me get a glimpse of what my life will be like if I actually ever move out (fat chance ha!). Also, it makes me appreciate being in a house with others a little more. Empty house= a smidge on the lonely side. Nonetheless, it makes my stay-cation a little more exciting since I'm actually away from my house, even if just by a few miles.

Otherwise, my stay-cation looks to be pretty uneventful. I have two tests this week, so it's gonna be study central so I can hopefully so better than my last two tests. I'm having friends over to swim today and Thursday. I'm excited to see Charli and hopefully her sweet baby girl Adi. Looks as if its gonna be a pretty chill week!

On a serious note, my friends Cody and Chad Dorris lost their father unexpectedly this morning. Please keep them and their family in your thoughts and prayers during what I can only imagine is a devastating time.

High/Low/High 1.0

So I know I said I was gonna do the high/low thing in an earlier post, but after I thought about it today, I decided on high-low-high cause you should always end on a positive note, right? So here is high/low/high: the first edition!

High

The first high of the week has been the time I've got to spend with Nicole this week and really the past few weeks. We used to have a really tight knit group of girls that worked together, ran around together, and pretty much spent an obnoxious amount of time together. It was fantastic. But as time goes on, babies and boyfriends (now husbands and fiancées!) and new jobs have broken us apart and we really don't see each other much at all. Nicole and I have become so close in the past five years that its hard to think that we've ONLY BEEN FRIENDS FIVE YEARS! She has been such a great friend,

supporting me when I needed it most and giving me a swift kick when I needed that too. She and I live on different schedules though. She teaches elementary school and I attend college. She has a fantastic man that she's about to marry and we all know I'm single and mingling. We find a way to make it work, but the past few weeks, we've seen each other more than we have all year. And have I mentioned? I LOVE IT! I've enjoyed wedding planning and eating and just spending time together. I'm so happy to be apart of her life and now Maid of Honor in her wedding!!

Low

This week has been pretty great, so it's hard to find a low, honestly. But the one I can come up with is not doing as well as I had hoped on some tests. For those of you that don't know, my first round at college was not one to be proud of. I was young and dumb and made lots of mistakes. But now, I'm focused on what I want to do with myself and have really been trying harder to excel in my classes. I studied more than I think I ever have for any test for these two and just made mediocre grades on them. Really irritates me! Hopefully, the next tests will be better though :(

High

I got to hang out with my sweet baby nephew last night and kept him today while his mom went shopping and dad worked. I really enjoy the time I get to spend with him, especially if its a time that helps his momma out. I surprise myself with my motherly instincts with him. I have wiped

more undesirables from his body without a thought than I ever even dreamed of doing. There's no better feeling than when he says Aunt Kayla or when he gets excited cause I come to visit. So basically, I just love the kid. So thankful for a baby to love and spoil and play with-and then to send home!